Friday, September 14, 2018

5 Things I've Learned In Five Years Of Marriage

Hello everyone!
Erik and I celebrated five years of marriage yesterday.
After five years of marriage and ten years together I like to think that we know a thing or two about relationships.
I thought it would be fun to share five things we have learned in our five years of marriage.


Communication, Communication, Communication
Communication is important in any relationship but especially in a marriage.
It can be hard to constantly communicate especially if you are like me and tend to shut down or are like Erik and need to distance yourself from a heated situation to gather your thoughts.
It is crucial to talk to each other.
Especially during those heated moments.
Even if you have to come back to it later.
Just make sure you actually do.


Speak Their Love Language
If you have not heard of the five love languages I would highly suggest you hop over here and find yours out.
A love language is how someone needs to receive love.
It is important to know your significant other's love language,
It will help you understand them better as a person and understand what they need.
Mine are quality time and gifts.
Erik's are physical touch and words of affirmation.
I try to show Erik physical affection even though it's very much not my love language.
I know it will make him feel loved and that will bring us closer together.


Always Have Savings
I feel like this is a good piece of advice for life in general.
Erik and I had a few very bad first days of marriage.
They consisted of our car breaking down, getting stranded in a small town on our way to our honeymoon and spending thousands of dollars...
From our first day of marriage we decided to set aside a certain percent of our paychecks into savings.
It has been a life saver!
A lot of stress can come from finances in a relationship.
Having a savings account can help eliminate some of that stress and give you more options than gaining more debt.
Erik and I have faced several more trials after our first few days of marriage and it has always been nice to have a safety net to fall back on.


Continue To Date Each Other
Erik and I have crazy opposite schedules.
That's why we set aside time for a date at least once a week.
It isn't always a "fancy" date.
Many times it's sitting at home, ordering in food and bingeing a new show.
After a long hard week out in the world, there's nothing we want more than to be at home.
But we also try to shake things up and go out and try new things.
Whatever we need and whatever fits into our schedule we make it happen.


Spend Time Apart
What?!
A lot of people are surprised when I offer this piece of advice.
I love Erik and I love spending any and all time I have with him,
But over the years I have learned the importance of spending time apart.
When people enter a relationship it is easy to get lost in it.
I think it is really important to remember to be your own person.
Just because you are in a relationship does not mean that is all you are.
Erik and I have our own hobbies, our own interests and our own friends.
Because of this we have many opportunities to experience things we enjoy with other people.
Spending time apart gives us time to grow individually and to actually miss each other.
Whenever I come home from a night out or a weekend away I am so relieved to be back with Erik and always have a new found appreciation for him.


The past five years haven't been perfect but they have been wonderful with Erik by my side.
I am so grateful for him and look forward to eighty more years together!
I hope these pieces of advice were helpful.
Do you have any pieces of advice to share?

All my love,
Autumn

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